I have sworn off bitching about things I can’t change, and also bitching about things that I could change if only I would put an little bit of effort into changing them. DO NOT WORRY I AM STILL THE SAME ANGRY NEGATIVE NANCY THAT I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN. I’m just trying to be negative only about shit that’s worth my energy.
I gained some weight after changing a medication during my last few months in Jerusalem — 25 lbs in 3 months. Since then, I’ve been on again off again on diets, and of course, barely exercising at all. I bought some clothes while I was in training back in the States, but not much. I was holding out hope that the weight would melt off, and I’d miraculously fit into all of the cute stuff I’d bought while I lost weight during my first 22 months in Jerusalem.
The weight isn’t melting off, and honestly, I’ve reached a point in my life where I’m really fucking tired of feeling down about my body. Regardless of whether I’m trying to eat healthier, lose weight, move more, or whatever, I deserve better than to feel crappy about myself because of the way I look.
This morning, I woke up, looked at my overflowing closet, and decided I was done. I cleaned it out. Everything that’s too small is packed away. My gym clothes (which I am finally using regularly again) are all together, and I can see what I need to buy (MOAR T-SHIRTS), and what I don’t (no more leggings, no more studio cardigans). My work clothes are together, and I can see what I need to buy, hem, or toss.
I feel better.
Like a thousand pounds were lifted from my shoulders.
Now only if I could get those pounds off my hips too. ;)